


Change Happens

by k_d_garrett



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games)
Genre: Depression, Drama, Family, Farting, Friendship, Frostback Mountains, Unplanned Pregnancy, chantry warrior nuns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-21
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-11-01 17:21:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17871533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/k_d_garrett/pseuds/k_d_garrett
Summary: Grey Warden Alistair and Keira Hawke have some drama and become friends.





	1. Chapter 1

It was the middle of summer and a blizzard was moving in. And not just any blizzard. There was lighting that hopped across the Frostback Mountain tops. Thunder echoed off the rocky walls like a giant’s footsteps. It had such a hard thump, it sent a rumble through Alistair’s chest every time.  
Typical.  
Typical both in the sense that the Frostback Mountains were always dangerous but also because Alistair decided to take a shortcut to get to Orlais. Completely alone. On a rugged, narrow, abandoned path. Through the dangerous Frostback Mountains. The last eight years of heroics and adventures had made him lose his common sense. At least he had some reasoning behind this decision. Warden Commander Clarel had summoned everyone to Orlais because the Grey Wardens in Orlais had all begun to hear the Calling. Alistair had a funny feeling it had something to do with the probably not actually dead Corypheus. Originally, he had plans to meet up with some Ferelden Wardens to travel with but was stopped by Leliana and a group of her spy friends. She was trying to find Abigail. It took some convincing, as the last time Leliana had seen Abigail and Alistair they were still close friends. That ended with Amaranthine. When Leliana finally accepted that he had almost no information, she let him go and his traveling companions were long gone. According to some old Warden documents, there was a hidden Chantry monastery along the hazardous path he took now. Likely a decoy Temple of Sacred Ashes. Hopefully, it was still in use after all this time… with living and friendly people that is.  
The path to the monastery was partially blocked in spots with rock slides and the occasional dead tree, and after two days, it only got narrower the further he went. The rocky walls closed in around him to a point where he had to climb up a little way between the rock to be able squeeze through. A thunder roll caused him to slip down with a shout. His foot jammed into the narrow crevice below him. To get it free, he had to untie his boot and pull his foot out into the ice-cold air. It didn't help that his sock was sweaty. Despite the frost that formed on his sock, he took a moment to roll his ankle and move his toes to make sure the dull pain he felt wasn't serious. He pulled the boot out to slip it back on before the cold could do any real damage. Then he heard the whine. A dog’s whine. Alistair looked back to the path behind him for the source of the whine only to hear a bark from above. When he looked up he saw a mabari that paced back and forth on a nearly invisible ledge about ten feet above him.  
"Well hello there. Is there a nice wide path up there?" Alistair asked. The dog whined stressfully and reached its paws down to a smaller ledge just below as though it wanted to climb down, "Don't worry, I'll come up there." Once Alistair got his boot securely back on, he started the climb up towards the dog. The dog whined again and looked back behind itself, which made Alistair take pause, "Or do I not want to come up there?" Alistair slipped back down a little at the very idea that something terrible was over that ledge. The dog looked back down towards him and barked as if to say no. It pulled it's paws back up and began to pace and whine again. It's head turned back and forth between whatever was behind him and Alistair. The mabari had a warm vest on and a spiked collar, so clearly it wasn't a stray, "Does someone need help?" Alistair asked and the dog barked triumphantly.  
Alistair began to climb up the cold rock wall more quickly, only to pause when lightning flashed. He braced himself for the hard thunder so he wouldn't slide down again. Then he felt his hair pulled upwards painfully, "Ow, ow ow!" Alistair shouted. The mabari had managed to climb down a little to grab Alistair by the thick scarf he had wrapped around his head. Which included his hair. A few more feet, and Alistair reached up to grab the ledge to pull himself fully up, "I'm up, I'm up! Let go!" he shouted as he swung his legs on to ledge. The mabari let go and ran towards a cave, barking. At the opening the dog hopped up and down, then waved his tail-less rear side to side. Alistair took a quick look around to get his bearings. The ledge was part of a path that continued on in the direction he needed to go. The monastery couldn't have been that much further away. The last rockslide he came across must have diverted him from the path.  
"Who is out there?" a woman's voice echoed from the cave.  
"Uh, just me. Alistair," Alistair shouted and began to approach the cave opening.  
"Alistair? Alistair who? Or are you just some random Alistair?"  
"Alistair of the Grey Wardens," Alistair unwrapped the scarf from his head as he entered the cave.  
"My ass you are," the woman said. He could barely see her form at the back of the cave, bundled up in a blanket and laid out by a very small fire. She continued, "Oh…wait... you are him. What in the blazes are you doing here?" As he got closer, his eyes adjusted and he could see her face better. He recognized her right away.  
"Keira Hawke!?" Alistair had only meet her once but recognized her.  
"The one and only," she said. She didn't seem to want to move from her place, she barely even lifted her head to look at him. Something was wrong and her attitude seemed more nonchalant to hide it. The mabari snuggled up next to her and whined painfully.  
"This is Dash by the way. The storm out there has him real spooked," she carefully wrapped an arm around the dog and patted him lightly.  
"Are you hurt?" Alistair asked as he knelt next to her.  
"No, no, I'm fine, " she shook her head. He realized she wasn't wrapped up in a thick blanket at all. She was dressed warmly for a trip in the Frostback Mountains, heavy robes with a hood over her head, scarf around her throat holding the hood in place. There was just an extra bit of plumpness that didn't come from the clothing.  
"Are you pregnant?!"  
"Pregnant? What on earth gave you that idea?"  
"Your belly is very.... swollen."  
"How rude! Did anyone ever teach you any manners? Calling a woman fat like that!"  
"I’m sorry!"  
"I'll have you know I had a very large supper. I was starved," she winced and rubbed her belly a moment, "And now I am having terrible gas you might want to keep your distance."  
"Right... " Alistair nodded. She was either in an extreme amount of delusional denial, or terrified of something Alistair wasn't aware of. Alistair looked back out at the mouth of the cave. It had begun to snow large chunks of flakes. If the storm was as bad as it threatened to be, in the next hour this cave would probably be an airless death trap with one good snow drift, ".... what are you doing up here in the mountains?"  
"I asked you that first and you didn't answer me," she snapped back. Alistair had heard what had happened in Kirkwall. He had heard that Keira had stood with the mages despite what Anders had done. Had things become so bad that Keira Hawke had been run out of the city that once championed her? There would be no point to try to find out now, the incoming blizzard was a bigger concern.  
Alistair shrugged, "Oh, I was just passing through the neighborhood. On my way to a safe Chantry monastery that I hope will have some soup prepared." That made her drop the defensive behavior in an instant.  
"A Chantry monastery? Way up here? With soup! I had no idea.... does anyone else know about it?"  
"It's a big secret, isolated place.”  
"You don't say! Maybe....now this is just a suggestion, but maybe Dash and I could join you. I promise I will stand downwind from you." At least he didn't have a too difficult wall of mistrust to break down.  
"I wouldn't mind the company. Can you even walk after having that very large supper of yours?"  
"Walk? Bah! Walking is so last year. I wobble now. It's the latest thing in Orlais and I have mastered it," she tried to sit up but rolled back flat on her back.  
"Good, I was afraid I would have to roll you over there," he stood and held his hand out to help her up. She took his hand and waved her free hand at him.  
"Both hands now or we'll both end up on the floor and it'll get awkward." He took her other hand and carefully pulled her up, Dash even got behind her to push her up. She let out a loud strained grunt as she stood upright and the very strong stench filled the air.  
"What did you eat?” Alistair waved a hand in front of his face.  
"I told you a whole goat, even the hooves and horns," she turned and collected a sword and shield that leaned against the side of the cave. Dash picked up a large bag from the floor. She secured the shield onto her back and took the bag from Dash, using clasps to attach it to the back of his vest, "Wobbling takes a lot of energy. By the time we reach this monastery I'll be starved again. You sure there will be soup?"  
“I said I hoped. I’m really not sure,” Alistair admitted, “I just know it’s there and it’s safer than here.” They began to walk the path, carefully, close to mountain wall for support. The snow blew down between the mountains and threatened to shove them off the ledge. A thick fog blew in with it to mask the path ahead.  
"Wait! Wait a moment," Keira shouted over roar of the wind. Alistair looked back at her, she was awkwardly, turned sideways a little with her hand in the bag that Dash held up to her, “I think I dropped my pendent in the cave."  
"Too risky to go back for a necklace," Alistair shook his head.  
"It's a family heirloom! Has the Amell crest and it was my mother’s… I can't leave it behind!"  
"As soon as the storm clears, I'll come back and see if I can retrieve it for you. For now we need to keep moving or this storm will kill us," Alistair said. She sighed deeply. There was doubt in her face that he would be able to do it. Dash whined and pushed his head up behind her to move her forward.  
"Alright, let's just keep going," She said in a defeated voice. The path sloped further down and began to widen. Even the mountain walls began to spread further from each other. This only allowed the wind and snow to strengthen their assault on the three. Then Alistair saw a flicker of light.  
"I think we're almost there, I see a light up ahead" Alistair began to move forward more quickly, but then was grabbed by his arm and pulled back, "What's wrong now?"  
"Well, if you really want to walk off a cliff be my guest. I'm just not going to follow you, " she said. Alistair looked down to see the path did abruptly turn alongside a sharp edge in the mountain wall. The fog was so thick and he kicked a rock over the edge to try to hear how deep it was. The roar of thunder and wind prevented any sound from echoing back up.  
"I think I see the light too," she said, "The path probably turns back around..." then she winced in pain. Her hand on his arm grasped very tight and Dash began to cry-whine in a terrible way. Alistair felt a sharp, terrified pain in his own stomach.  
“Oh no! Oh no! You’re in labor aren't you!?” he shouted  
“No,” she worked out a pained smile, her grasp on his arm faded and she laughed, “What are you still on about pregnancy? You should see the look on your face. I just passed gas again that’s all, don't worry so much.” Dash whined again.  
“She is in labor, isn’t she?” Alistair asked Dash.  
“Don’t answer that!” Keira warned. Dash whined with his ears turning down. It wasn't a direct yes, but it was enough of a yes for Alistair.  
He grabbed her hand and attempted to lead her away, “Okay! Wobble faster Hawke!” Only she didn't budge from her spot and she pulled him back. She was far smaller than him but had a remarkable strength that prevented him from making her budge from her place.  
“Cliff! Alistair, cliff!” she shouted.  
“Right! Cliff! Let’s go this way!” Alistair tried to pull her around the bend, but she still had her feet planted firmly in the dirt.  
“Calm down and breath,” she said and he swung back around to look at her, “The pains are very far apart. This is my first and my water hasn’t even broken yet. There are many terrible hours go.”  
“So you are pregnant!” Alistair shouted.  
“Yes! Yes! Now calm down!”  
“I am completely calm!” They both flinched when lightning struck a little too close above them. Thunder vibrated around them and a handful rocks tumbled down the mountain wall.  
“We’re almost to the monastery, right?”  
“Yes!” Alistair began to pull her again and this time she allowed it, “If this is your first, how do you even know you have time.”  
“I’m the eldest of two other children besides the twins…”  
“Really?”  
“One was a still birth, the other passed when he was two. The twins were a miracle really. When I was in my teens, my mother did some midwife work and I helped.”  
“Your sister made it sound like your family was constantly on the move. Why would your parents even….” He trailed off not wanting to finish the sentence.  
“I’m not even sure how I’m pregnant right now, things just happen like that.”  
They finally came down to an end to the path and into a wooded valley. Once inside the forest they found some relief from the harsh wind, but thick snow to wade through. There Dash sniffed the air and took the lead, guiding them straight ahead.  
"Do you smell hot soup, boy?" Keira asked. Dash abruptly stopped with his head high and stiff. In the howl of the wind, the shouts of people and the thump of horse hooves drew close. Dash barked frantically to draw their attention.  
"They must watch the paths into the valley very carefully,” Alistair said. Ahead of them, swerving between trees came three well-armed women on horses. On their chests of their silver armor were golden sunbursts, "Thank the Maker," Alistair sighed. Two of the horses each pulled an individual sled. The sleds were shaped like little boats, short and narrow, but big enough for a man to squeeze into with bent knees. Each had a blanket stuffed inside.  
"Quickly, into the sleds," one of the women shouted, "We'll get you to the monastery." Keira grumbled about the likelihood she would get stuck while Alistair helped her lower into a sled. With the blanket wrapped around her she was packed in there tight with her sword and shield. When Alistair climbed into his own sled, he quickly found it was to be shared with Dash who climbed up on top of him. He didn't bother to protest the dog, Alistair felt a bit of guilt at how icey the poor mabari's bare paws looked. Dash's ears even looked a little blue.  
The ride was not comfortable at all between the large dog and the bumps the sled hit as they swerved through the forest. At least he was very warm. He gained feeling back in his gloved hands that he hadn't realized he had lost. When they reached a clearing before the temple, the ride became noticeably less bumpy, but they were assaulted by the snow. It blew sideways. Alistair could barely see beyond Dash's alert head now.  
Finally, they reached the monastery. From his position Alistair could barely catch a glimpse of the outside of it. They came in through large wooden gate doors and a group of nuns bundled up in thick winter robes gathered around, shouting to each other. The nuns immediately detached the sleds from the horses and pulled them through what was probably a small courtyard. For a moment he could see a statue of a woman with icicles hanging from her chin like a spikey beard. They were dragged up a bumpy set of stairs and brought inside a warm, well-lit building. The ceiling was stunning. Covered in incredibly detailed, painted Chantric symbols and stories. As the bundled nuns pulled Alistair up from his sled, he could see the ceiling paintings continued down a large hall with benches near the front and a large Andrastian statue.  
An elderly woman's voice broke his trance with the ceiling, "A little over an age ago it was painted by Sister Alys," Alistair looked over at the woman as she approached, a warm smile on her wrinkled face as she continued, "It took two decades of her life to paint and she died shortly after she completed it."  
"It's really remarkable," Alistair said. Suddenly there was a shout and he looked over to see Hawke standing, bent forward with two nuns grabbing her by the arms, and two more trying to pull the sled from her rear. Dash hovered around Keira like a worried mother hen until they finally pulled her from the sled. She lost her balance though, falling forward into the nuns arms nearly toppling them all backwards. The nuns straighten her back up and she promptly put her hand on her back in pain.  
"Are you alright mistress?" one of the nuns asked  
"No," Keira shook her head.  
"I am the Revered Mother of this monastery, Dina," the elderly woman introduced herself.  
"I am Grey Warden Alistair, nice to meet you, I was passing through on my way to Orlais...."  
"You brought your pregnant wife through the Frostback Mountains to go to Orlais!" one of the nuns shouted and the expression of disgust and horror crossed all of their faces.  
Keira immediately added, "I know he's a very rude husband, he made fun of my weight earlier."  
"No! No!" All Alistair needed was rumors being spread that he had a child with Hawke, "No! We are not going to do that!"  
"Relax, I was just kidding," Keira laughed nervously, and Alistair quickly realized the awkward spot he had put her in. Though she tried to recover from it, "I got a little lost when I was trying to escape some bandits and if it hadn't been for this kind Warden, I would have died out there."  
"Up in these mountains, by yourself and so heavily pregnant?" the revered mother raised an eyebrow.  
"It is a very long... long and complicated story, and if you wouldn't mind I'd like to have some hot soup and to lie down first." Keira rubbed her belly and winced.  
"Take her to one of the guest rooms and someone see if we have any soup left from supper," Dina ordered and several of the nuns quickly led Keira away. Dash trailed behind them. Dina turned back to Alistair, "I imagine the blight must be quite severe by now. We haven’t seen any refugees pass through since it began"  
"Ah...we actually ended it within a year...”


	2. Chapter 2

The monastery’s isolation was as Alistair suspected. They had no idea that the Blight had ended. The only reason they were aware of it to begin with, was because there was an influx of refugees that year trying to escape to Orlais through the worst possible routes across the mountains. After that, with the true Temple of Sacred Ashes discovered, no pilgrims or adventurers had passed through since.  
They had guards posted on their walls and a handful of tall towers across the valley. They managed to briefly spot Alistair, Keira, and Dash descending the mountain before the three got into the forest. These nuns were warriors, they practiced daily in the ways they believed Andraste trained to fight. They believed that Andraste in spirit had led the various women there to train for a greater service to the Maker. Whatever that would be and when was very unclear. It was also not the first time a pregnant woman showed up.  
Adult men on the other hand were not typically welcome to stay very long. There was a separate area of the complex set up for any temporary male visitors at the very front. When a man occupied that hallway, it was heavily guarded for the night and men were not permitted to leave their rooms until dawn. Otherwise, adult men weren't allowed any further inside the building beyond attending any services in that main hall. Although Alistair wasn't too hurt about that. He didn't exactly want to be present when Keira did finally give birth.  
As a small gesture, Keira sent Dash to keep Alistair company for the night. She declared that Dash was a risk to the nuns purity because he was also male and enjoyed sniffing lady crotch.  
The room he was set up in was more comfortable than he imagined it would be. A nice bed with extra blankets, a fireplace, rugs on the floor, heavy curtains over a thick glass window, a dresser, and a small table that they served supper on. It was hot potato soup in a beautifully painted ceramic bowl. The wood furniture was beautifully carved, the rugs and blankets with complex patterns, and the craftsmanship was all excellent. It was all Andrastian themed with swords, sunbursts, topless women, fancy knots and flowers plastered on every inch.  
The designs were on the very fine line of being overdone and tacky and were a clear testament to how much free time the nuns had besides their exercises. With the warming of his body, all the bruises and aches numbed by the cold came on strong. Even his ankle throbbed. It was the exhaustion that finally took over.  
The next morning, Alistair woke up with Dash taking up the majority of the bed and adding to the body aches. He painfully pulled himself out of bed, then poked his head behind the thick curtains to see outside. The sun was already rather high in the sky. They had let him sleep in. In the courtyard, a handful of nun's busied themselves shoveling snow off of stone paths. A few of them smiled and waved to him.  
He couldn't stay long not just because the monastery had an aversion to men, maybe another night at the most but he had a mission to visit the Orlesian wardens to complete. Before he could leave though, he wanted to fulfill his promise to Keira. He was going back to try to go back to that cave and see if he could find her pendent. Dash would be able to help sniff it out. A nun brought in a tray of breakfast for him and this was when Dash rose from his slumber. More potato soup. The nun gave them permission to leave the room by inviting him to join morning services.  
"Do you happen to know how Keira is doing by the way?" he asked.  
"Exhausted. Poor woman was up all night in labor.”  
“No baby yet?”  
“No. I can't believe she had planned to give birth alone in a cave! A few will stay with her during the morning services just in case."  
"If it's not too offensive, I think I'll skip morning services myself," Alistair said.  
"Leaving so soon? I wouldn’t think the paths out of the valley would be clear enough yet. I thought you'd at least stay to see the baby."  
"I’ll return. I need to back track for something that was lost last night. If the path isn’t too bad."  
"Well, let me inform the stable girls. They will let you take a horse that way your trip will be quick."  
Dash followed when Alistair rode the horse out of the monastery. He wondered why he never got a horse of his own. He knew how to ride. How the nuns got into the valley with horses was a mystery, but trekking across Ferelden would have been far easier if he had a horse of his own. He was through the forest and galloping back up the mountain path in no time. The horse plowed through the snow like it was nothing. At one point in the climb, Alistair paused to look back at the monastery. It was a huge, three-story stone carved building in the mountain side. The towers at each corner of the walls, were two tall, bare chested women holding a sword in their right hands up against their bodies. The structure looked ancient.  
When he finally got to the cave, it not completely snowed in. However as they approach the cave, Dash began to snarl.  
"What's wrong?" Alistair asked as he dismounted the horse. Dash slowly approached the cave with his head down and ears flat. The snow around the entrance of the cave had been disturbed. Someone had done some digging to get into it, “Is someone there?” Alistair shouted. Out stepped two templars. Their skin looked sickly pale and their eyes red. Clear signs of heavy lyrium use.  
"Who wants to know?" one of them snapped.  
“Grey Warden Alistair, who are you?"  
"The Alistair!" Both of their eyes light up.  
"Yes..." Alistair realized then they were probably in their early twenties, maybe even teens. Too young to already be so sick looking from lyrium use. But it had been a long time since he had been around Templars. Maybe he was getting old.  
"Wow! Maybe you can help us! My name's John, this is Benedict, and we're trying to find Hawke."  
"Why are you looking for Hawke?" Alistair asked.  
"Didn't you hear what she did?" John asked.  
"Clarify for me."  
"She helped that maleficar blow up the chantry in Kirkwall. Someone's got to bring her to justice and it might as well be us!"  
"We're real close to finding her too," Benedict held a pendent in the air, "We found a pendent with the Amell crest on it!"  
"Amell!" Alistair thought quickly, "Let me see that." He stepped forward and took the pendent from Benedict's hand, "This is not Hawke's."  
"Then who's is it?" John asked.  
"This is the Warden Commander Abigail Amell's pendent. I've been tracking her for years now!"  
The templar’s gasped, and said in unison, "The maleficar of Amaranthine!" As much as he hated what happened, it was painful to Alistair to hear that title instead of the Hero of Ferelden.  
"Let us help you take her down!" John shouted.  
"No! Too dangerous. Every templar that has come up against her has failed. I know her, I can get close to her," Alistair said.  
"But we're not like normal templar's," Benedict said.  
"She's not like normal mages. I watched her cut darkspawn in half with just a wooden staff,” that was actually true, “Trust me on this."  
"You don't understand! We have...." Benedict became red in the face when John grabbed him by the shoulder. It was almost as if he was about to attack his own companion.  
"No, forget it. I don't think we have enough to fight Amell. Remember we were only going to keep going ‘cause we thought we were close to finding Hawke. If we've been following Amell by mistake, we've completely lost Hawke's trail now."  
"But..."  
"We have to go back."  
Crisis averted. The two waved goodbye and turned quietly away. Wishing Alistair good luck in finding Amell. It would be a white lie, he wouldn’t let Keira know who he ran into. If these were in fact the people she was running from. Well there were two white lies, he wasn’t going to tell her why he was passing through. But at least the returning of her pendent would help hide those lies.  
When Alistair returned to the monastery, services were still ongoing. He sat on one of the benches to the back, listening quietly to the Chant of Light. It had been a very long time since he sat in on any religious services. There was something comforting and warming about being in that atmosphere. He felt like a little boy again. Escaping the dark, dreary reality outside the chantry doors.  
The services came to an abrupt halt as a side door to the main hall swung open. Excitement filled the room as the Revered Mother swiftly stepped out with a wide smile on her face.  
"I would like to announce that a new life has entered the world," the nuns all gasped with joy and clapped as she continued, "Keira has had a healthy baby girl. The birth was a bit complicated, but we believe Keira will make a full recovery after some rest. This goes without saying, but please be mindful if you walk the hall where Keira is staying."  
When the morning services ended, Alistair tried to give the pendent to the Dina, but she shook her head. She leaned in close to Alistair, "I'm going to make this exception considering Keira's condition… and the trouble she’s been through. She has requested to speak to you.”  
“To speak with me? Why?”  
”She has told me much. With her experience… her mood… it is very dark. I’ve seen dark moods before with new mothers that come to us. More times than I care to count. We have been able to help heal these women but in this case…” she took a shaky, deep breath, “I fear that Keira will leave the child behind here and disappear for good. If you can at all reassure her that she will be safe here with the child."  
“I…. I can try. I really don’t know her that well.”  
“Returning this pendent to her yourself, when she had so much doubt that you would, will turn things in your favor. Now follow me,” she led him down the hall.  
So much doubt? He thought to himself, But I’ve kept such a good, clean reputation compared to most people. They were strangers, yes, passing acquaintances through Bethany. Still his feelings hurt a little. As he walked through the door to Keira’s room his eyes came to her red hair poking out from underneath heavy blankets. Next to her bed was a wooden box on a table and as he drew close he smiled. The small baby was wrapped up tightly in a blanket, her head was still cone shaped and her eyes clamped shut in displeasure with how bright the world was. Dash put his head up on the edge of the box, sniffing rapidly. He whined when his tongue was too short to reach the baby. At the sounds of her dog, Keira pulled the blankets down from her face.  
"So. You had a baby?" Alistair couldn’t help but to beam with some excitement.  
"Baby? What baby," Keira rolled over onto her side to face him, "I have no idea what you are talking about."  
"You are not seriously going to continue this?"  
"I am absolutely serious. There is no baby. You cannot tell anyone that this child exists do you understand me?" her eyes were fierce and Alistair felt his own stomach drop at the idea, "My friends do not know, my sister does not know, the father does not know, I didn’t know until about four months ago.”  
“Four months?”  
“I had a lot on my mind! No one knows this child exists and that will be in her best interest."  
"So that it’s? You’re just going to leave her here?"  
"I have to," she said. Dash came around the upper side of the box and snuggled his head onto the bed next to Keira.  
"But Dash is going with you?” Alistair asked.  
“Dash is a grown adult animal that can care for himself if something happens to me.”  
"Did you want to have children?"  
Her quick nod yes, became a shake no, “but not like this... I have to go."  
“Why…. it’s guarded here, it’s so isolated. I don’t think anyone would even know you were here. Why even entertain the idea of abandoning your own child."  
"You’re right about this place, she will be safe here. I can’t stay here. My presence makes it not safe. I’m giving her a clean break. Freedom.”  
“You don’t think it won’t be absolute misery not knowing who you are?” Alistair could feel his heart pounding in his head, “You don’t think she will try to find you?”  
“The constant fear, constant moving. You wouldn’t understand.”  
“I do understand what it’s like growing up without knowing my parents,” Alistair snapped.  
“From what I heard you grew up in the castle in Redcliffe.”  
“I was a stable boy...”  
“You were safe.”  
“The Arl’s wife thought I was his bastard, tormented me, and then I was sent to the Chantry to become a Templar.”  
“You were uncomfortable, but you were safe.”  
“Stop trivializing….” Alistair huffed, “your sister…I mean she told me some of the awful ones, but she told me some really wonderful, happy stories about your family. Do you really think that you would have been better off growing up without your family?”  
Keira shook her head, "You really have no idea. Something is terribly wrong,” tears began to roll down her cheeks, “It's like this dark ominous cloud follows me everywhere I go. Everything keeps falling apart. I've lost one too many people in my life because of this…. it’s like a curse. I can leave my baby girl here and she would be so much safer," she gasped, "and she can have a stable life and not have to always be on the run. She doesn't have to know her family name or who I am and she will be safe...." she gasped again so hard that she gagged and covered her mouth, "Oh maker! Fenris has magic in is blood line too. She's going to be a mage. What have I done.... I've fucked up her life so bad already."  
"Okay, look. Take a deep breath,” he sat on the edge of the bed.  
"I’m tired of breathing! Drunken goodbye sex was a terrible idea!"  
“Fine! Life can be horrible. Life can be absolute misery. You disappearing is only going to add to that. I’m telling you right now, if you continue to run you’re adding more pain and misery to everyone you love,” That was when he remembered he had the Amell pendent. He pulled it out and held it up in the air, "I promise I won't tell anyone, but please reconsider staying here for your daughter. It’s safe and secure…. "  
"You actually went and got that for me?" her voice swung high in shock.  
"I told you I would. I don’t go back on my word.”  
"You actually went and got this for me...." she took it from him and pressed it against her chest. The tears began again. She gasped and snorted and then a snot bubble came out of her nose. Alistair quickly reached in his pocket for his handkerchief and handed it to her. She blew her nose hard and rubbed her eyes on a dry part of the cloth.  
"You said this was a family heirloom. You can't possibly think that you would have been better off without your family if this amulet matters so much to you.”  
“I….I just need to sleep…” Keira said.  
“Rest then,” Alistair stood up, “I can’t force you to stay, but please just think about it. I’m going to stay another night and I’ll leave early tomorrow. If circumstances permit, I’ll come back around and if you’re not here…. I guess that’ll be that.”  
“Thank you, Alistair. Have a safe journey,” Keira pulled the blankets back over her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been working on this silly thing since Dragon Age Inquisition's release and I realized the other day it's been just over four years. I decided I should just share it with the world and stop fiddling. I would hope there are no errors after all this time, but I've got it so memorized I'm going to find things after I post.
> 
> I just really liked the idea of Alistair and Keira Hawke becoming hiding buddies watching each other's backs. I know I've seen people be very critical of the Bioware writer's decision to have Hawke just disappearing on everyone (including LIs) between DA2 and DAI and I get it. Hawke experiences vary. I thought it worked so well for Keira's personality and after everything that happens and after two very close, trusted friends just abruptly betray and destroy so much. It makes sense for her to have such a severe personal, paranoid crisis and run away. She is the first PC that I head canon having/wanting children (she was almost the only, the second is a swtor character) and I figured the only way it was going to happen at this point was through a surprise pregnancy.
> 
> Alistair is in a lonely boat due to my game choices, had his big friendship breakup with Abigail a while back, and then has the Grey Wardens turn on him. I figured having Alistair and Keira meet before the latter happens, puts him in a relatively stable state to support her. Then she supports him when he returns. Being that he is technically an orphan himself, I couldn't help seeing him trying to put on the breaks before Keira commits to completely abandoning her child. 
> 
> Everything just clicks.


End file.
